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006 - Omni Magazine Contest Results Grand
Prize Winner:
When
a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet, and when toast is dropped,
it always lands with the buttered side facing down. I propose to strap buttered
toast to the back of a cat; the two will hover, spinning inches above the
ground. With a giant buttered cat array, a high-speed monorail could easily
link New York with Chicago.
Runners-up:
If
an infinite number of rednecks riding in an infinite number of pickup trucks
fire an infinite number of shotgun rounds at an infinite number of highway
signs, they will eventually produce all the worlds great literary works in
Braille.
Why
Yawning Is Contagious: You yawn to equalize the pressure on your eardrums.
This pressure change outside your eardrums unbalances other people's ear pressures,
so they must yawn to even it out.
Communist
China is technologically underdeveloped because they have no alphabet and
therefore cannot use acronyms to communicate ideas at a faster rate.
The
earth may spin faster on its axis due to deforestation. Just as a figure skater's
rate of spin increases when the arms are brought in close to the body, the
cutting of tall trees may cause our planet to spin dangerously fast.
Honorable
Mentions:
Birds
take off at sunrise. On the opposite side of the world, they are landing at
sunset. This causes the earth to spin on its axis.
The
reason hot-rod owners raise the backs of their cars is that it's easier to
go faster when you're always going downhill. |